Reachy
New Member
An oldie but goodie which some of you may have seen before (although I think some of the words are distinctly "English" slang, "slapper" anybody?). The female repost is new to me though.
>Dear Technical Support -
>24 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2,
>which I had used for years without any trouble.
>
>However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and
>the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound
>turned off. To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with
>several other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and
>Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.
>
>I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left
>a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several
>weeks. Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at
>the same time,
>only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they
>caused
>severe damage to my hardware.
>
>I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this
>product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0
>tends to use up all my
>available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and
>Cleanhouse2004.
>Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very
>unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically
>stored in
>Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months
>later
>when I had forgotten about them.
>Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and
>can,
>without warning, launch TurboStrop and Whinge. These latter products
>have no
>Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is.
>
>Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
>requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express
>which needs to be
>reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my
>Saab 93
>Convertible hard drive, it often crashes.
>
>Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which
>can't be turned off. Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress
>2003, but there could
>be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife
>1.0
>detects Mistress 2003, it tends to delete all of your Money before
>uninstalling
>itself.
>
>Help requested please?
>
> _____
>
> Please enter the command: "http: I Thought You Loved Me.HTML" and try
>to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
>If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
>automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and
>Flowers 3.5.
>
>But remember, overuse of the above application can
>cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5,
>Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
>
>Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the
>Snoring Loudly Beta.
>
>
>Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it
>runs a virus in the background that will eventually
>seize control of all your system resources). Also, do
>not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program.
>These are unsupported applications and will crash
>Husband 1.0.
>
>In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it
>does have limited memory and cannot learn new
>applications quickly. You
>
>might consider buying additional software to improve
>memory and performance We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot
>Lingerie 7.7.
>
>Good Luck,
>
>Tech Support
>Dear Technical Support -
>24 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2,
>which I had used for years without any trouble.
>
>However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and
>the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound
>turned off. To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with
>several other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and
>Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.
>
>I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left
>a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several
>weeks. Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at
>the same time,
>only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they
>caused
>severe damage to my hardware.
>
>I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this
>product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0
>tends to use up all my
>available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and
>Cleanhouse2004.
>Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very
>unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically
>stored in
>Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months
>later
>when I had forgotten about them.
>Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and
>can,
>without warning, launch TurboStrop and Whinge. These latter products
>have no
>Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is.
>
>Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly,
>requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express
>which needs to be
>reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my
>Saab 93
>Convertible hard drive, it often crashes.
>
>Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which
>can't be turned off. Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress
>2003, but there could
>be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife
>1.0
>detects Mistress 2003, it tends to delete all of your Money before
>uninstalling
>itself.
>
>Help requested please?
>
> _____
>
> Please enter the command: "http: I Thought You Loved Me.HTML" and try
>to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
>If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
>automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and
>Flowers 3.5.
>
>But remember, overuse of the above application can
>cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5,
>Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
>
>Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the
>Snoring Loudly Beta.
>
>
>Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it
>runs a virus in the background that will eventually
>seize control of all your system resources). Also, do
>not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program.
>These are unsupported applications and will crash
>Husband 1.0.
>
>In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it
>does have limited memory and cannot learn new
>applications quickly. You
>
>might consider buying additional software to improve
>memory and performance We recommend Food 3.0 and Hot
>Lingerie 7.7.
>
>Good Luck,
>
>Tech Support